Wednesday, December 27, 2023

Chapter - 1 : To be or not to be is not the question but the answer

In the quirky world of corporate escapades, I've become a bit of a nomad – a professional wanderer on the quest for the perfect workplace or as I would really put it, a bit of a risk taker who gets bored easily and can be enticed with a greener pasture any time . Why, you ask? Well, I've distilled my reasons into a science, a wannabe comedic masterpiece that explains why I leave companies more frequently than a cat changes sleeping spots.

First and foremost, the work has to be as interesting as a penguin in a tutu. I mean, who wants to spend their days counting paperclips or attending meetings about meetings? At my last gig, they promised excitement but delivered more yawns than a sloth on a Sunday afternoon. If my job isn't a rollercoaster of intrigue, I'm packing my bags faster than you can say "boredom." The light bulb in my head went off when at MulayamKauwwa I literally dropped my head and laboured my shut eye open while in a conference room with a customer. In my opinion product or platform sales do not give enough room to be inventive and to indulge in my favourite part of a customer conversation - to lie through my teeth and convince the customer that with Data and AI I can cure their 3rd stage cancer if I tickle it.

Now, feeling important is the secret sauce of a satisfying job. Let me clarify, not being important but feeling important. It's like the sprinkle of bacon bits on a salad – without it, what's the point? At MulayamKauwwa, I hit all my targets with the precision of a ninja throwing star, yet I felt about as significant as a single pixel on a giant screen. Sure, I was a productivity wizard, but if nobody notices, am I even there? I worked for 3 hours a day and played xbox most of the time and my boss wondered how was I getting so much work done. Really helped me understand the standard set by the large companies for work and the yes man-ship and politics that goes on to convince others that we are doing work. So, off I went "again" in search of a place where my talents are celebrated like national holidays. In the best month that I had there from a sales point my boss said " this is good but you came to office only once last week". And this was one of the better managers in the company. But I digress. In all my previous endeavours I felt like the company needed me. But in MulayamKauwwa I felt like MulayamKauwwa doesnt really need anyone since they are a force to reckon with on their own. So just being there was not really giving me any reason to look for a future.

Another example about this is a fresh grad who came to work in my team while I was at Quantiphi. She once made a presentation that I presented to the client. I told her I couldn't have done it without her great work on the presentation which I could have just as easily. But it motivated her so much that on every occasion I did this, she rose above her preset level. In 5 years she is now at a senior position handling a business unit on her own which others can only dream of at her age. So while she was very average , she felt important even when she was not and that propelled her to excellence. What I thought to myself is I will never ever stay in a place where I do not feel important. At the end of my time there she asked me what gift would I like and I said a severed thumb would be apt. We laughed but it really did mean that in her growth, she did all the work while I just motivated her and yet I get to walk away as the person who taught her everything. I have truly been blessed with some managers(oops should I say leaders instead?) that did the same for me.

Now let's talk about ponds for a moment – the age-old debate of big fish versus small fish. In my opinion, being a big fish in a small pond is the way to go. I'd rather rule a kiddie pool than swim aimlessly in the vast ocean of anonymity. At one place, I was like a minnow surrounded by sharks at a tech giant. Sure, I survived, but I felt more like a fish stick than a majestic sea creature. Now I've found my cozy pond, where I'm the king – or at least the duke – of the aquatic realm.

In conclusion, people say you need to look for reasons to stay at a company, but I'm a minimalist. I only need one ... Ahem... reason to leave. The assurance that I won't be stuck in a cubicle coma, drowning in insignificance is a bonus that might deter me from leaving sometimes but I eventually will leave.

So, here's to the next adventure, where the work is as exciting as a spy thriller, I'm treated like the CEO of Awesomeness, and my pond is just the right size for a fish of my stature. Off I go, with my suitcase and a smile, ready for the next chapter of my career escapades! Sorry Shakespeare for spoiling your quote. But I do really think that " To be or not be is not the question but the answer to ensure your happiness"

Lets end with the list of places I worked at and what they taught me:

1. NEC
Learning : Good work should always be rewarded.
What I took back : A love for travel and food
What I gained : An Amazing habit of alcohol which we will cover in detail in later chapters
Why I left : Child marriage and the need to be in Pune

2. Idea Cellular (VI of today)
Learning : Not all work is worth doing
What I took back : A decent brand name on my resume
What I gained: Clarity on what I really want to do
Why I left : My friends(Plural to not single out Peacock God) said we should do an MBA now

3. Cheers Interactive
Learning : How to sell Ice to an eskimo
What I took back : anecdotes on how to be a good manager from Vishal one of the best that is
What I gained : The starting of an ever increasing belly and a friend I will treasure for life
Why I left : $$

4. Directi/Media.net
Learning : Marketing is the cornerstone of a business even if not celebrated as such
What I took back : What not to do as a manager from one of the worst that could be there, Ironically also named Vishal
What I gained : Bank Balance
Why I left : Meh

5 Phonon
Learning : I can suck at my job too
What I took back : A negative experience
What I gained : Vadodara as a brilliant place to live
Why I left : Well, I was fired

6. Tatvic
Learning : Tech is foundation to everything
What I took back : Table tennis coaching!
What I gained : The field of data
Why I left : Maharashtra calling

7 Quantiphi
Learning : How to be a leader and build a business
What I took back : the best experience of my life
What I gained : My future
Why I left : Canada is too cold

8. MulayamKauwwa
Learning : Politics is essential in every large organisation
What I took back : Loads of money
What I gained : Clarity that I will never work for a large organisation again
Why I left : Well, read the chapter

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